did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
