I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
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