Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
