You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
