I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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