next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
