summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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