remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
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