Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
