I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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