is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
