We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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