sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I don't deserve a penis
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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