I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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