Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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