I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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