matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
