4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
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