so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
