Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
