Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
