There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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