she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Randomize
