Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
