is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
