Me too!
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
