At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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