I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
