nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Acid is not a monday night drug
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
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