i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Randomize
