No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
