and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
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