New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
