at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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