when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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