Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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