is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
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