He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
