They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
tell me about the fingering
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