Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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