she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
