Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
