He kissed a someone with a penis
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
