new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Randomize
