try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
