Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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