You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
