We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
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