I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
