I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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